Dear Eddie, I’m glad some things remain. 1967. You stood me up on the Newberry Hall bench at Alma College. You twirled me around, singing, “She loves flowers, she loves animals, she loves her family, she loves God, and she loves me more than even I love myself. On the outside back then, you thought you were pretty hot stuff.

Flowers remain. When I called you to supper tonight, you were busy in the greenhouse. You were flatting baby snapdragons. We just received notice that your application for the market has “unquestionably” been accepted. You courted me with flowers—bouquets, corsages, sprays of orchids. Fifty plus years later there is an orchid beside the kitchen sink and we will share your bouquets at market for another season.

Pets remain. A meow in my ear at 3 am signaled that Peter, our cat, needed a drippy faucet fountain turned on and a long drink before exiting out the back door. Louder meows and metallic pings as he plucked the window screen at 6 woke us enough to lie very still against each other, waiting for the other one to give in, get up, and open the door for the beast to enter.

Family remains. Our kids are grown but loved as ever. We never even dared to dream we would be so immersed in the lives of our grandchildren. Tonight, I wait for one to finish soccer practice, scroll Facebook for our boy marching at Universal with his high school band. This afternoon, I talked college scholarships with our Senior. Last night, we cuddled and shivered under a pile of blankets at a lacrosse game, watching our long-stick defender.

Our God remains. I am thankful that we bonded together in a relationship that included Him so long ago. He continues to hold us and shape our lives in whatever comes.

Love remains. I do love you; and your love for yourself is greater than in 1967—more grown, more tried, less in need of defense. All of these things have been shaped by our experiences through the years yet they remain. And you still make me smile when you twirl me.

Sylvia

For your couple conversation: What are essentials in your marriage that remain?