Dear Eddie,

Thank you for another wonderful two-night-minimum getaway. For years, we have prioritized time away for the two of us. We have learned that it takes at least two nights away to really relax. We repeatedly put two-night-minimum on our on-going Marriage Growth Plan. We often talk about where we have been, and we talk about where to go next. There are good reasons we have those conversations. Our recent Valentine weekend at Hilton Head Island proves the point.

Our getaway gave us the chance to unplug from our usual very satisfying life, including important logistics, and experience each other in new ways. It was a full day of travel, first looping north to take our Abby to District Honor Band. Even in that long day, we enjoyed Winter woods transforming to Spring woods with red maple in bud and the first Carolina Jessamine blooms decorating the median trees. Finding the cute little hotel directly on the beach, we were immediately glad we did not cancel our trip when our Better Marriages of Georgia event was once more postponed in Covid world. It would have been so easy to just stay put at home. We were rewarded with a gorgeous sunset crowning our first evening beach walk. After supper, we crashed, sleeping twelve hours. Next morning, we met each other ready to organize our next few days in whatever way we chose,

Organizing ourselves in a totally new getaway place demanded talking with each other. Where were we anyway? What did we want to do, now, today? Maps, walks, exploring options, finding fun and appropriate food, if/then conversations. You are a lot of fun. I love new places with you. Boring—not a bit. It’s kind of a kick to find I can still push your comfortable edges, and you even say you like it after some initial growling. 53 years plus, and you are not bored either. That is good.

New getaway experiences reminded us of other places and times in our lives. Any beach makes us harken back to Galveston, Clearwater, Daytona. Dogs on beaches reminded us of Sparky and Buster. Some couples reminded us of early “just we two” times and places. Couples with one child in a stroller and other couples with “the perfect family,” for us one girl just older by a tad than a little brother, made us smile. Ibis in a marsh and pelicans on a wharf reminded us of many birding adventures. And, as for your comfort zone, having a relatively mild time, as in no driving in Florence, nor bandits at the Puerto Rican waterfall, nor gypsies on a Granadan hillside made for giggles about past experiences. New experiences mixed with memories made our connection glisten.

Difference from our usual, finding our way together in new places, and re-experiencing our life together. Promise me we will plan another getaway soon. I love you, Valentine!

Sylvia