Dear Eddie, We have a lot going on. Sometimes, I hear fatigue in my voice when I say those words. Our list may look like logistics. And, we have long warned that logistics may steal way too much of our couple conversation. Perhaps though, taking a peek at our recent list can tell us whether we are staying on track with our couple goals or not.
Goal One: We want to stick around with each other for a long time. Once, I could say those words blithely; at 78, not so much. A reality is that everyone we know is “under surveillance” for one condition or another. The upside is that we have a lot of “hot dates”. This doctor/ that test. I am very glad that we accompany one another. And I’m not crazy about the alternatives either. Sticking around also means sharing our hearts, even when it is uncomfortable talking about uncomfortable things.
Goal Two: We both intend to live out a purpose that requires us to be available and open hearted to those we love. That includes our family and our community. Our busy list of celebrations, reunions, and daily activities reflect our values of connectedness, affirmation, and encouragement. When I study our list with our values in mind, I think we do prioritize what matters. If we start to find things on our list that don’t fit the values, we can hit delete.
Goal Three: We have declared that we want to continue to work for better marriages, beginning with our own. Thank you for participating in a retreat weekend just for us. We considered being a legacy marriage. We were urged to find something we could share with another couple. We came away reenergized once again. So, this week’s MEG will once again look at surviving and thriving in an upcoming holiday season. And we will share building a marriage growth plan in the Savannah Better Marriages of Georgia Getaway this winter. I did not think I had any more energy for the work, but you and I, and lots of other marriages are worth a bit more effort.
Are you ready to check out our latest list? I bet we will always have a lot going on. It is just what we do.
Love, Sylvia
What are your Marriage Values?
Does your “To Do” List reflect those values?
Do you need to set some goals for your marriage?
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